Kneeboard Surfing USA Community Forum

wolruss wrote:K-man you must be sitting on the oil heater.

...Sense of humor russ...Thats a good thing.

Why don't we change the post,call it the wining thread Some of you folks...grow some skin!.....

two cents: let them make us look bad or whatever, keeps the real geek sheep from thinking its cool and the real "beggars, halfmen, cripples, and et.al" can stay in the shadows of the barrels were we belong....


The real deal: guys like Steeno/legless, Mike F. Ksusa.org, and ALL of you who know who you are... Thanks.

Mike Fernandez wrote:Another shitty article written by an uninformed person with nothing but an opinion. Even sounded like he thought Bill Lerner, Bob Gove and others were dead. He really compared us to a murderer? Can I have my minute back from that read?

agreed!

Any publicity....... is good publicity .

Hey, it's wonderful that some of us are so worked up at this article. It shows a purity of thought and intention and only underlines our enthusiasm for the sport.

Here's my analysis of the article - not complete, and boring as anything, but I think it reflects the true intentions of the Journalist. As far as I can see the only misguided attempt at humour, as far as kneelos are concerned, is the reference to the Unibomber.

I enjoyed doing t his. I studied critical reasoning for six months and it helps you break down arguments and articles and the crap that you see happening in your daily life into logical mouth sized bites.

I think breaking it down like this tells me that we can choose to be offended by this article, by taking what he says out of context. Or we can choose to be mildly amused by taking the article as a whole and not letting our emotions select only the part of the article that we want to see.

And taking the article in context also means taking into consideration the photographs that accompany it.

Apologies to Cake for deleting this yesterday. I decided I'd rather go for a surf than play on the forum.....

As some of you know, California has had a nice little run of surf lately. Nothing huge, but consistent swell from both hemispheres coupled with warm conditions—super fun stuff. It was about three days into this wave barrage when it happened. Sitting on my own private peak down from the main crowd, I looked towards the beach and watched as a bodyboarder paddled from shore straight for me. I tried to Obi Wan him down the beach, but he somehow he remained impervious to my silent mind control, kept his line, and kicked his little rubber fins in my exact direction. Damn it.

1. In the first paragraph: The writer sets the scene- slightly amusing, we all know Obi Wan never existed and that he and his powers were fictional. We can all relate to this scenario, sitting by ourselves when someone else decides to help "share our waves".

As he got closer, though, I noticed something. This guy wasn’t a sponger…he was a kneeboarder. Holy sh*it.

2) In this second paragraph he insults bodyboarders. He insults them in an over the top manner. He has not given us an opinion eiether way on the kneelo.

My peak protectionism status went from full alert to at-ease. Suddenly I was excited to share this little corner with half a man.

3) IN the above paragraph he appears to insult the kneelo by calling him a 'half an". Or does he? Is he in truth using a term of affection?

Those old enough will understand the “half man” nostalgia. Like the dinosaurs, kneeboarders have pretty much disappeared from the face of the earth, and to see a live one is like excavating a fossil. And never, not in a million years, did think I would ever be this happy to see one again.

4) He expains that yes, "half man" is a term of nostaligia.

To understand this surprising endearment, let me take you back. Back to an era when longboarders hated shortboarders and shortboarders hated kneeboarders and kneeboarders hated bodysurfers.
Back to a time of peace and love.

5) More humour - see the last sentence.

In the 70s, lineups the world over were populated with kneeboarders, and nowhere was this more true than La Jolla, California. When I moved to the area in 1979, kneeboarders ruled the La Jolla slabs and were some of the best surfers at Black’s Beach.
And like mosquitoes, they were bothersome as hell.

6) If you were round in the seventies, then you will know this was true. If you weren't around then you aren't to know either way ..... You can take this last senetnce as an insult if you choose, that is until you read the next paragraph.

Truthfully, La Jolla kneeboarders were pesky because they were really good. Like four-legged creatures on land, they could move faster and more tirelessly than you. They could make steeper drops, and fit into the tube more efficiently. This was especially true at Black’s, where they could chase down a canyon peak, fit earlier into the almond-shaped barrel, and then just sit in the tube until the cows came home.
It sucked.

7) Above paragraph explains why "they were as bothersome as hell". Answer : "Because they were real good... etc" More humour in the last line of this paragraph (It sucked). It's a common technique to elicit a laugh by giving a complement on the one hand, and taking it away in the next (works with women - try it)

As time went by, though, I got to know some of these guys and sadly, started liking them. Most of them were smart, and, almost without exception, were…well…let’s call it…quirky. I don’t know what it was, but for some reason kneeboarding had an uncanny knack for attracting eccentric, non-conformist personality types. Nut jobs and geek geniuses. Bow tie wearers.

above paragraph, more humour, uses same technique of the giving a complement and then taking it away (sadly, started liking them). More complements follow "smart", "non conformist" "geek genius" etc. In my personal experience this is true. Think spoon, think Peter Berry, think guys who ride with huge concaves, guys who make night surfing helmets.
Interestingly the Oxford Dictionary has as one of it's definitions of "Geek" as "a knowlegable and obssesive enthusiast". You can chhose to take the emotive definition and take it as an insult but you have to look at the context "geek genius" and you will see he is using the same humour technique as previously mentioned.

Put it this way: if Ted Kaczynski or Orville Redenbacher rode waves, I’m pretty sure they’d be kneeboarders.

9) Above paragraph contains the first derogatory insult by likening us to Kaczynski, who Wiki describes as a social anarchist and Neo Ludite, but also as a murderer. I think the journalist is refferring to the fact that Kaczynski was accepted into harvard at 16 - and so trying to be amusing but has fucked up. Orville Redenbacher? It seems he invented popping corn. Whoopydoo.

Then, right when I started liking these guys, they started disappearing. Some of them turned to stand-up surfing, some quit, but some of them turned to the darkest side of all—they became boogie boarders.

10) Above paragraph. A true statement. Kneelos did vanish relatively speaking. Humour in the last sentence.

I think it’s pretty clear that the boogie board ultimately killed kneeboarding. When “esky lids” hit the scene, those quirky youth that might have become half men turned to sponging.
And nothing, absolutely nothing, can make you miss kneeboarders more than a pack of boogers kicking straight for you.

11)) Above paragraph. Something killed kneeboarding (that is: it is less popular than it was in the 70's) The journalist states that "the boogie board ultimately killed kneeboarding. If you consider that "By the late 1970s, tens of thousands of bodyboards were made and sold in the United States each year...." then you might make the connection the same as the journalist did.

So I’d like you all to take a moment of silence and remember the half men. Think of guys like Bill Lerner, Rex Huffman, George Greenough, Peter Crawford, Tom Litton, Bob Gove, Grant Brittain, Ron Romanosky, Dave Markeby, Dale Kobetich, Wooly the Wandering Aussie, and ‘Blacks’ Jack with fondness.

12) Above paragraph. The line basically says "Remember the half men... with fondness. The journalist has gone to the trouble to research some famous names i n kneeboarding. Nothing insulting in this. He has not remarked that they are dead. The i nference is that they do not have the high profiles they once had.

In fact, in solidarity, get on your knees and pray for the universal dream. Assume a kneeboard stance, and ask a higher power for a more perfect world—a world without boogie boarders.

13) Final paragraph. The journalist t ies up the article nicely, ending on a humerous note, and impossible wish for a "perfect world". The only people he insults are boogie boarders. Once more in an over the top manner that indicates an attempt at humour.

Amen Headwax. Great post, and spot on analysis, IMHO.

thanks cake great waves here yesterday, sending some your way!

We are the brick in a world of iPhone 5s and barely that. Gotta get over it.

Does it really matter?

I'm more offended, correction, embarrassed, by the insecure responses in this thread than the time worn perspective, be it humorous or belittling, by Sufferer Magazine. Yes you read it correctly. Sufferer. Nothing redeeming has ever been written about kneeboarding other than deep tube riding and it's predominantly creative and independent practitioners.

So what. Where's the foul?

On one hand, the diehards tout the nonconformity and smile.....while the thin skinned wail like cats when the half-man crap goes to print. Jesus H Christ....it isn't a swear word....I swear....I see it written on 18 wheelers every day. Fact is....ya just can't have things both ways. Either you are content being an outsider by choice or you aren't....and if yur not....then where is it that you really stand...for your own piece of mind....why do you want to fit into their equation?.....Fair enough question.

And why does any kneeboarder who's been at it from their own start, knowing full well the biased stigma incumbent within surf journalism and the culture itself, really give a rat's ass about what Sufferer Magazine does...or does not say about KneeBoarding?

Gilley's job is to fill space. He did his job....with a proven Sufferer Magazine formula. Read into it all ya want but Headwax pretty much broke it down accurately. Ain't no big deal. (.....and where'd that post go?????...oh now it's back...thanks! )

If this kinda stuff really gets ya pissed off then deductively the problem is on your own side of the equation.

Albert, this is not to slight you, just a reference point on Sufferer's fixed mindset. Remember when the Sufferer "Letters to the Editor" staff writer responded to your anger over non-inclusion in their posting the US Championships Results last century with the comment..."It's says SURFER Maqazine right on the cover."

Doesn't get any clearer or straightforward as that. Made sense then....makes more sense now.

Their's isn't to please....it's to allure the simpleminded for subscriptions and sell ad space based on those numbers. Just business....not journalism.

There's legless and this place....be satisfied there are two places for kneeboarding they cannot control or manipulate. In here we're all Surf God's of our own making.

As for myself, I detest all surf publications....ALL OF THEM. I just like the pictures on my retina after a good surf with friends......those images hold the soul of it all without the BS.



Bobby

CaptKneemo wrote:wax. fell asleep right after 6 months of....in the united states of america, prior to the late 70's critical thinking didnt need to be taught, it was just the way it was/is.

i'm sure everything else you typed was.....zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

heh, CaptKneemo don't blame you for falling asleep!

around here we have alot of guys with short attention spans,
so it's nothing for you to be ashamed of!

Salute to you!

happy surfing

RW wroteth

Gilley's job is to fill space. He did his job....with a proven Sufferer Magazine formula.

Too true.

People forget a journalist's job is not to provide facts, but to "entertain".
To put bums on seats.
It's been the same ever since the first wandering minstrels hit the road.
Even since (arguably) the caves at Lascaux.

Choose to be insulted by his remarks? It just gives more hits to his article and encourages his next one...

Sufferrer mag? Love it

RW

wolruss wrote:RW

+1 or should that be +1/2

OK, I surfed Blacks yesterday after work with Randy and as I was coming in a young college kid also coming in next to me says "I can't believe it. I just read an article about kneeboarding and then I see you! I've never seen a kneeboarder before today!" Of course, I know what he read.... Since he seemed so stoked I smiled and was glad he met me Young college kid carries on "I think kneeboarding's cool but those spongers...." I can't remember his actual disparaging words but I promptly interrupted him to say "Whoa, hold on now. Those guys charge and demand our respect for the surfers that they are!!!!! He was unfortunately influenced in a bad way by the article but maybe he's never thought for himself either. Of course, I was still smiling in order to give him a chance to reconsider his bias. I went on to point out that Bob Gove and Bill Lerner charge out there all the time and that if he surfs there going forward that he will see plenty of kneeriders. His last comment was to describe how he saw another kneeboarder on a yellow stick out there killing it.

Randy's board is yellow

Regarding the above post.... this is what I had in mind about the bodyboarders:

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